Dear Gwen Cooper,

WTF? When did you become who you were supposed to be? Why are you suddenly adorable and/or awesome? I HAVE BEEN FERVENTLY LOATHING YOU FOR TWO SEASONS. WHY AM I LIKING YOU? WTF IS GOING ON?

(lilithilien, you were right. I do not comprehend.)

Baffled,

Me



Dear Deniz Öztürk,

Wednesday night when I haven't really slept in three nights and I have roughly 20,000 words to do for work by, like, yesterday? IS NOT THE BEST TIME TO BE PESTERING ME WITH YOUR PUPPY EYES AND YOUR WOOBIE AND YOUR IDIOCY AND YOUR LAUGHABLE SOAP PLOTS AND YOUR DRAMATIC EYEFLASHES. OKAY?

Fondly cranky,

Me

PS: Why are my dominant writing muses always bratty teenagers? Gah.


Dear AWZ,

If you fuck this up, I will hurt you. Don't think I won't. More importantly, don't think I can't.

Cynical yet stupid-and-hopeful,

Me


Dear f-list,

HAI! I LOVE YOU! OMG SO TIRED!

*snogs*

Okay, I have a music crush. This happens rarely enough that it merits a post.

Initially, Christina Stürmer was just the chick who's doing the theme song for this cracky show I may be a little obsessed with. Then I randomly looked for more of her music, and it turns out I am actually madly in love with her. She even beats my other girlcrush of the year, Merlin's Katie McGrath, by a hair's breadth, by the simple virtue of being able to sing. I adore her slightly smoky voice and the way she seems to overdo it just a tiny bit too much at concerts, like she feels she has to give this somewhat larger than life impression of herself, when she's actually pretty damn perfect the way she is, so she ends up looking like a bit of a dork. I LOVE DORKS.

I am also in love with her piercings and her casual khaki wear and her slightly slouchy shoulders and her self-mockery when she does her Austrian accent. OMG Christina. Never change, okay?

Tonight I wrote. Ok, just 500 words, but it sure as shit is more than I've written in well over a month, so we'll count that a victory. And it's all due to shellydkitty and her cracky powers of inspiration *loves*

In other news? No so much news! I live. I don't post, but I read the f-list, surely that counts? lol.

My job needs to go away. But still give me loads of money. While I'm not working. That can work, right? Also, I need house elves. And a timeturner thingie, because even without sleeping, I don't have enough hours in my day and fail massively at the simplest things, like, replying to my fucking emails already. Why is there no optional internet mindmeld yet? I could just quickly log on inside my brain and tell someone "OH HAI, I AM NOT DEAD, AND I THINK OF YOU ALL THE TIME, REALLY. HERE, HAVE THE THOUGHT PROCESS LOG TO PROVE IT." C'mon, science. Enable my lazy, for sheesh.

EKP insanity still progressing nicely and at insane pace. Yes, you may blame German soaps for my infrequency and my absence of brain. Really. Go ahead. They won't mind. WHEEEEEEE!

*HUGS ALL*

It's past midnight, I am waiting on crap to install to my new, finally downgraded computer (which has been my new computer for like two weeks without actually being used... Vista is an evil bitch) and I am way too deep in hiatus on LJ/IJ. Let's use a random daft meme to ease back in, shall we?

( Stolen from everyone else. How do they make these things so Americanised? )

I swear I'm going to do an actual update. I swear I will. As per usual, it will probably start with "I AM ALIVE".

In the meantime, though, my show made my head explode today. In a good way. OMFG.

(  Nicht so.  )

TWENTY SECONDS THAT BRIGHTEN MY MORNING.

WE LIKE RANDY. RANDY CAN STAY.



(I also love that Lil had this clipped about an hour after it aired, heheheeh)

I know this has been ages in coming. I blame the EKP frenzy these past months! To make up for it, watch me break the character limit again, lol.

Title: In This Home On Ice – Chapter Five: Flooding the Ice
Author: aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles Was Zählt, Deniz/Roman
Word Count: 12,500 words
Rating: R
Summary: Roman has accused Deniz, more than once, of never learning a lesson, but now he has to wonder whether that accusation doesn’t apply just as surely to himself.
Disclaimer: Sadly I don't own these characters; I just like watching them fight. Only original characters with completely daft names are mine :p
A/N: Many, many thanks to my completely lovely betas, alsha and lilithilien (without whose insights this chapter would SUCK!) Also, apologies to the lovely and insane graspthethorn, who's already used a very similar title for her drabble Flood, which y'all should read because it is lovely (and not insane). Sorry, sweets! There’s only so much usable skating terminology to go around! Master list for previous instalments is here.

( Flooding the Ice, Part 1 )

Today I set out to write and finish my flippin' chapter 5 because it's been a bloody month or two. So I sat down, opened my doc, stared morosely at the screen. About three hours later - i.e. after I'd sorted through some old photos, done PR work on EKP, painted my nails black, changed outfits five times, had lunch, read my f-list, commented on my f-list, had more lunch, did a second coat on my nails, watched lilithilien's There's a chance I'll start to wonder and shellydkitty's Das Eis lügt nicht about a dozen times for inspiration and had finished half a bottle of wine - I finally started writing. About eight hours after that, I finally finished a first draft and I don't care if it's shite, at least it's ruddy well done. Man. This thing has been like pulling teeth.

To reward myself and also because I was too lazy to cook, I dragged alsha out for dinner at the pub and we'd just started playing a round of Scrabble when this random guy popped up and asked if he could play too. Neither of us was too keen but he just sort of invited himself in and started blabbing. Uhm, weird, but whatever, we can play Scrabble. Then he stuck around when our food came, though, and it was kinda awkward so eventually Alsha politely told him to bugger off - thank god, cause I'm too nice and would've probably just sat there all evening and endured the awkward, lol. It's the kind of thing where I smack myself after and go, "dude, it would SO have been okay to tell him right away to bugger off", but it's just odd when someone just casually inserts themselves into your private space as if there's NO QUESTION IN THE WORLD that they might not be welcome. Also, you never know, sometimes you meet really interesting people that way and end up having a grand old time but with this one it became obvious pretty quickly that that would not be the case. (And no, he wasn't hitting on either of us, either, he just sort of flopped down and pretended we were all best buds).

Now I am TIRED because apparently certain people have infected me with the sleep bug. BORING. But I still gotta fix up this chapter, otherwise I'll just shove it in some folder and not look at it for the next five months and I want to be DONE WITH IT, dammit.

I seriously need to get organised about Dreamwidth. The thing is, it does take time to actually sit down and organise stuff and time and organisational skills are things that forever elude me. Srsly, I need a personal assistant to organise my life. Or maybe a house elf. Yes. That'd do.

Mainly, I just want everyone to be in one place, lol. I'm already having trouble juggling two journals and scrambling after my fifteen hundred online bases to cover on a regular basis. *grabs people and things of interest and squishes them into same virtual space*

This week, I have been working on my fic! I've hated pretty much every word I've done on it, but hey, words were produced. I think I realised about three quarters of the way through that I have too much boggy detail and that this probably didn't need to be its own chapter, but dammit, I have 10,000 words, I have sweated several bucketfuls of blood to get them, and I am not tossing them, so hah.

It doesn't help when instead of sucking and inspiring me to fix it (as usual), my show is actually being awesome right now. lilithilien and shellydkitty have been busy little beavers subbing recent episodes at Eskimo Kiss Project to have something to counter-balance the suckage of the older ones (DeVa era, joy), and lo and behold, some of the recent ones have been more than watchable. They have actually been good. Like, really really good. This boggles my mind:

( Spazzing flail )

Title: Hands-On
Author: aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles Was Zählt, Deniz/Roman
Word Count: 1400 words (i.e. STILL TOO FREAKING LONG FOR A DRABBLE)
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Deniz is totally straight, and totally over Roman, except when he's fantasising about him, of course. (Shelly's Alternative Summary: DENIZ VANKS WANKS.)
Warnings: Mild dub-con fantasy.
Disclaimer: These characters are owned by RTL, who don't believe in phone sex, or in wanking. WHAT'S WRONG WITH THEM?
A/N: This is a follow-up piece to my phonesex fic Hands-free, based on another prompt from the lovely shellydkitty. This one was: I'M DYING FOR A DENIZ-WANKS-THINKING-ABOUT-DOM!ROMAN-PHONE!SEX FROM YOUR FIC HANDS-FREE. HAHAH I WANT FANFIC FOR YOUR FANFIC PLS. ALSO I LIKE WANKING. HAHAHA. Hope this hits the spot, Schatz! Unbeta'd, so please do point out any errors that I may have missed because certain ppl in certain chatrooms were being DEMANDING.

( Hands-On )

Title: Stuff About Things
Author: aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles Was Zählt, Marian, Deniz (established Deniz/Roman)
Word Count: 1500 words (i.e. TOO FREAKING LONG FOR A DRABBLE)
Rating: PG-13? I HAVE NO IDEA.
Summary: Marian doesn't want to know, okay? Except maybe he does. A little. BUT NOT. (Shelly's Alternative Summary: Marian would like to have gay sex with Etienne. Even though Etienne doesn't show up in this fic.)
Disclaimer: These characters are owned by RTL, who make them do dreadful things. DREADFUL.
A/N: For the lovely shellydkitty, maker of glorious icons, co-defeater of WMG copyright bastards, and all around shiny awesome person. The prompt she gave me involved Marian awkwardly asking Deniz about gay sex because he is curious because of his own repressed gay love for Etienne. Unfortunately I totally failed at the Etienne part because apparently I just can’t write Marian as gay, LOL. But I hope you’ll like it anyway!

( Stuff About Things (That Marian Öztürk Will Never Bring Up At Breakfast Ever Again) )

Goodness. shellydkitty and I were up late last night/this morning/whatever time it was, and feeling gloomy from subbing crappy DeVa episodes for days with hardly a glimpse of light on the horizon (at least until Ingo and Annette showed up), so we were looking for a pick-me-up and decided to give Verbotene Liebe's Tom/Ulli storyline a go. It's an older one (from 10 years ago, I think) and I thought it'd be interesting to see how gay storylines were handled back then. Now of course this is completely subjective, so no offense to anyone who enjoyed that particular storyline, but:

OMG, how bad. LOL. It's not even the repetitiveness of the plot, because I was vaguely aware of that before then, but...

1.) The characters. Uhm. I usually slash everything remotely slashable, but those two? Not a shred of gay. Not a shred of chemistry. Most awkward physicality ever. Dude.

2.) The dialogue. Completely wooden and expositioning wildly all over the place. Also wildly at odds with the acting, because if someone constantly talks about being in love with someone but does it with plasticky expressions and a stiff tone of mild boredom, funnily enough I don't buy the emotion. That was all over the place... so much telling-not-showing going on that it was laughable.

3.) The writing/plot: Probably not as bad as it feels to me right now but so wrapped up in the utter lack of connection between the characters that there's no salvation. Although it was funny to see how similar Ollian was to Tulli. LOL.

So, in short, it was really entertaining, but more in the sense of "howling with laughter at how bad it was". What it did do was give me a renewed sense of respect for how good the falling in love/coming out part of the Ollian story was, and you know what else... by the time we stopped watching these, my current disillusionment with AWZ was completely mended. Completely. I love my show! It's got actual connection between characters! Believable relationships! Snark! Snappy dialogue! Occasionally good pacing! Okay, it's making me want to rip off my scalp off with DeVa right now, but at least it's making me feel something, you know? At least I'm not sitting there giggling amusedly at the characters' supposed deep angst and turmoil.

Wow, what is this place? It looks vaguely familiar. It has like, icons and stuff! Curious. *pokes*

Well, I am caught up with my f-list. Kinda. Maybe. My inbox is a different matter entirely. EMAILS? WHAT ARE THOSE? And if work ever remembers that I exist, I'm in trouble, lol. WHERE IS MY RICH AUNT WHO WANTS TO BEQUEATHE HER SUBSTANTIAL FORTUNE TO ME, WHERE, WHERE?

It's getting into autumn here, but like last year it's mostly warm and the leaves are just starting to turn and be all gorgeous. Some hiking definitely needs to happen this autumn, preferably when the lovely feruche comes to visit in less than a month! Squeeeeeeeee! I CAN'T WAIT. Last weekend alsha and i went on a wee roadtrip to have a picnic/frisbee-playing/reading afternoon out in the hills. It was unfortunately cut short by interfering gnats, but fun anyway! I keep taking it for granted what an awesome place I live in.

Then last night we went out and discovered a super-cute pub that we definitely need to frequent more. Their berry cider was out of this world, and we played pink scrabble. Much fun was had!

I was reminded the other day that HBP is coming out soon. Dude. That movie has slipped so far to the back of my mind. I mean, I'm still gonna go see it, but I'm not anywhere near as excited as I would have been back in November. I maintain that moving it back that far was an epically stupid decision.

In fandom news, MY LIFE IS MADNESS.

( *puts behind cut to spare poor f-list that has had it up to here with hearing about German soaps* )

That's it for now, I think. Apologies for being sporadic and/or one-track-minded. One of these years I'll talk about something else, I'm sure. SURE OF IT.

I hope everyone's having a great weekend! *smooches f-list*

Oh wow, this week was utter, blissful madness. The lovely shellydkitty and I essentially ignored the rest of the world and went to live in Eskimo Kiss Land around the clock. We basically stayed up four days in a row (slept two hours out of each, hahahaa), CAPSLOCKED at each other 24/7 and uploaded a stupendously huge shitload of vids. We've got less than 30 left to go on the old timeline now and then we can join it all up and zoom ahead on the new one! It was so much fun I can't even begin to tell you.

In fact, our week was pretty much this:
( Crazy gay fantasy land = home )
Yes. That's exactly what it was like. Muahahahaha.

Among other things, we got up one vid that I'm particularly proud of, because it showcases the awesomeness of Ulrike Röseberg and André Dietz (contains spoilers for current eps):

( Interview of awesome) )

Sometimes I am just floored about the massive amounts of fun everyone on that set seems to have. I mean, I'm sure there are plenty of sucky days too, but you can see that they mostly get on swimmingly and have such a great rapport, and it really adds extra depth to the show. Granted, I don't find the show currently terribly interesting, but they so completely lucked out with their cast. I'll even watch shite plots just to see some of these people act. I love my very messy fandom.

Shelly and I also worked on a bunch of other awesome things and went completely crazy. And I'm not talking normal people crazy. I'm talking utterly batshit insane. Small children would have been whisked to safety, so I guess it's a good thing there weren't any around. It was glorious.

Also, because we have so much time on our hands (and because I very rudely stole all the subtitling), Shelly randomly went and learned video editing, AHAHAHAHAH. YES. Like, in a day. HER MAD SKILLZ TERRIFY AND DELIGHT ME.

And so, within a day, she's made this glorious thing:

( Gorgeous Roman skating vid )
It's a belated birthday present for Lil and a companion vid to her beautiful ficlet Wahr, which is still my favourite Roman character study ever and so gorgeous it hurts. And Shelly's vid captures that mood so beautifully... plus, SO MUCH PRETTY SKATING, OMG! (I found some of it, wheeee!)

So yes, that was my week, lol. Things have been NUTS and I am so out of the loop on everything else. I just continue to be amazed at how well the three of us work together and how hugely rewarding and fun this project is. It's fabulous to see people get invested, and we get a bunch of lovely appreciative comments and messages (in addition to a whole tonne of YT's usual ilk of "HAI THERE, I HAVE NO BRAIN", lol) that are a joy to read, and we treasure that...but the thing is that we're doing it first and foremost because we enjoy it so damn much. I love that to a truly silly degree.

I've slept normal hours this weekend, and my body does not like it. It's all confused and groggy and wants to go back to its nice pattern of 2-4 hours. One of these days I will eliminate the necessity of sleep entirely, I swear it!

I also haven't had time to watch the show this week, so I just raced through the four newest eps today. They were largely boring and there's no way I'm doing in-depth recaps, but I'll probably throw up a quick summary or something. And I need to work on my fic, OMG.

Ok, my music taste is generally best described as "cheerfully terrible". I stand by this ;)

That said, I find the lyrics in Cascada's Bad Boy hilariously DeRo-accurate, if you ignore that one line that mentions "girl". Seriously, I'm LOLing here. Someone make a vid!